If it's not Scottish....

"If you're looking for haggis," the chef of the vegetarian restaurant snapped, "you can find it out there." She pointed behind us, towards the door.

Ha ha.

She didn't realize it was Robbie Burns Day. And that my irreverent request had been a holiday-appropriate joke.

I wasn't looking to smell, let alone munch on any food containing sheep's stomach.

That's when she told me about vegetarian haggis. Now, I can find the thrill in tofu-flavoured meats as much as the next veghead. Duck and shrimp and sometimes even beef can be fun to compare to the original.

Which is why it'd be pointless to try the veggie haggis.

 Somehow I don't feel an emptiness from closing that door.